.day.2.

I re- Tanita's myself this morning - I weight 133.6 and my fat % is 26.9% my BMI is 21.6.

today is the second day of my liquid fast

I ended yesterday by drinking one cup of V8 wuth hot sauce - 60 cal
and then one cup of this awesome bolthouse farms green machine juice. - it looks like sewage but has the calories I need to keep me going - 140 cal.
then of course, lots of water, and some crystal light - 5 cal
205 liquid calories yesterday
im feeling thin.
but not thin enough.
.H. hasnt had an outburst in a while. thats for a few different reasons.
we changed his meds. it turns out .H. cant take generic brand zoloft. we figured that out the hard way...the really hard way as you probably saw in earlier posts. he couldnt deal with my depression and anxiety, and that fact that he got so violent with me deffinately didnt help my anxiety. things just got worse and worse. he can ONLY take name-brand Zoloft. the fuckers at the pharmacy kept telling us there were no differences. tell the bruises on my arms there is no difference.
gah. so hes leveled out alot...and I got on some new meds for my anxiety. and honestly...they really helps me. its actually changed my life. I can tell the difference big time.
.H. and I are happy.
we went for a walk yesterday, we cuddled and watched Canada lose to the USA :(
we played with and bathed our dog. and we...for the first time in months, really were acting in love.
I mean...we are in love?

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right now im drinking a very diluted crystal light and working away here at work.
I also brought some of my green machine - and im going to mix it with some protien powder and water?...gross... 110 + 140 cal - thats 250 cal...is it wierd that that seems like alot? hopefully it will fill me right up.
tonight I will probably have some more v8- 60 cals...I want to restrict to under 300 cal and stop having anything even water past 8

.x.x.

.R.